:: CBE - Centre Board Of Education

The month of Ramadhan is a period of fasting with reflection, devotion and generosity observed by all Muslims around the world.

While major holy days of other faiths have largely become commercialized events, Ramadhan continues to retain its intense spiritual significance.

The word "Ramadhan" comes from the Arabic root word for "parched thirst" and "sun-baked ground." It is expressive of the hunger and thirst felt by those who spend the month in fasting. As opposed to other holidays, when people often indulge, the Holy month of Ramadhan is by nature a time of humility and sacrifice.

Some benefits of this Holy Month are:
1. Through fasting, a Muslim experiences hunger and thirst, and sympathizes with those in the world who have little to eat every day.
2. Through increased devotion, Muslims feel closer to their Creator, and recognize that everything we have in this life is a blessing from Him.
3. Through increased charity, Muslims develop feelings of generosity and good-will toward others. The Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) has said that, "A man's wealth is never diminished by charity."
4. Through self-control, a Muslim practices good manners, good speech, and good habits.
5. Through changing routines, Muslims have a chance to establish more healthy lifestyle habits, particularly with regards to diet and smoking.
6. Through family and community gatherings, Muslims strengthen the bonds of brotherhood, in their own communities and throughout the world.

The Holy month of Ramadan is a very special time for Muslims, but the feelings and lessons we experience should stay with us throughout the year. In the Qur'an, Muslims are commanded to fast so that they may "learn self-restraint" (Qur'an 2:183). This restraint and devotion is especially felt during Ramadan, but we all must strive to make the feelings and attitudes stay with us during our "normal" lives after the month. That is the true goal and test of Ramadan.

May Allah accept our fasting, forgive our sins, and guide us all to the Straight Path. May Allah bless us all during this Holy Month, and throughout the year, with His forgiveness, mercy, and peace, and bring us all closer to Him and to each other.

CHILDREN’S
BEHAVIOUR

We want our children to behave well, and to: • have respect for themselves and others;
• be polite to others;
• know how to behave in different situations;
• be able to concentrate and pay attention;
• share and to take turns;
• know how to win and how to lose.

But children often behave quite differently, and we may feel annoyed, frustrated and embarrassed.

Usual Behaviour

Children may:

• have tantrums;
• shout and scream;
• hit siblings, parents, friends;
• not do as they’re told;
• break things, spill things, squash things;
• not listen or concentrate.

This is not unusual. Children are learning what happens when they have a tantrum, hit another child, say rude words. Children will always push against boundaries. They are checking out what their parents will draw the line at, what they can and can’t do. This helps them understand what is acceptable and what isn’t.

Parents work out their own ways of looking after their children. There is no simple recipe; it takes time for children to learn how to behave, and for parents to work out the best way of getting the best out of their child.

What makes children behave in challenging ways?

Children do not usually misbehave just to upset or annoy their parents. There is often a reason behind a child’s behaviour. It may be:

• they are upset or anxious about school;
• they feel jealous of their brother or sister ;
• they want their parent to listen to them;
• they want their parent to spend time with them.

Behaviour patterns can get stuck. At some point most children will misbehave to get attention. If a parent doesn’t pay much attention when children are behaving well, some children will try ‘acting up’ to get attention, even if it results in a telling off.

Coping Under Pressure

Coping with your child’s misbehaviour can be stressful. Sometimes it can seem like you’re about to reach boiling point. Parents need to find ways to reduce the pressure in the home and can do a lot to help their child’s behaviour through positive parenting. In fact, parents can make the difference between their child’s behaviour getting out of control, and helping them manage everyday life in better ways.

We will be posting more articles to suggest ideas to help you with your child’s behaviour.

What not to do on the first day of school

Think you're supremely unprepared for the fall grind? Think again. Chances are you've got some competition from the Mayhem family. Check out our expert tips to avoid your own back-to-school nightmare.

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By Missie Mayhem

The Sunday before Day One at our twin sons’ new middle school, we caught a morning flight from Miami to San Francisco. My husband wanted to save money with a redeye flight, but I put my foot down. The kids need to get ready for school, I told him. I thought my plan would give us time to get home for frozen pizza, hose the sand out of their hair, and buy two of those new Munch Boxes with self-cooling thermology they’d been nagging me for.

As it turns out, the plane was late, so we had to skip the family dinner and school supply shopping. But that’s why God invented fast-food takeout and paper bags, right?

After 20 consecutive days at the beach, Sammy started whining about not wanting to go to sixth grade. I tried to brace him: “Honey, you’re not going back to elementary school, so you better get used to it.” My wise counsel didn’t have the intended effect. Somewhere over the Rockies, he began whimpering, and when he saw the silhouette of San Francisco in the sunset, hyperventilation took hold.

“I’m … not … going,” he said between gasps.

“Do you know how many deprived kids around the world would happily eat their shoes to attend your school?” I pointed out.

“Then let them!” Sweat appeared on his upper lip.

I started to panic too. “You need to get a hold of yourself,” I said through gritted teeth. “I have to go back to work tomorrow.” The flight crew was giving us the eye. “I’ll give you a new iPod if you can just calm down.”

Jacob wasn’t complaining, so I assumed he was ready for his new life in middle school. Granted, he’d been playing video games 24/7 until blisters appeared on his thumbs. When he was asked to put away his Game Boy at takeoff, the nervous energy had to go somewhere. His legs began jiggling with maniacal intensity, and I tried to distract him by suggesting he do the math problems he’d been asked to complete over the summer.

“Not now, Mom!”

“It’s only 10 pages. You’re so smart — you'll finish it in no time!" Nothing worked until my husband threatened to take away his Game Boy. That roused his inner Einstein.

By the time we got home, both kids were complaining that they wanted a treat for the last day of summer. I let them stay up until 11:30 watching Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith.

The next morning was like Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride to hell and back. We slept in. I surprised the boys with matching school outfits their grandmother had sent. They burst into tears. I explained they had no choice but to wear them anyway because nothing else was clean.

There wasn't enough cereal for breakfast, so I announced a special treat: an Egg McMuffin morning! On the way to school, the boys were supposed to brush their hair, but Sammy spilled his orange juice on the brush, and Jacob retaliated by "accidentally" dropping his milk on Sammy's backpack. It was inevitable both boys would arrive on their first day smelling and looking like they'd crawled out of a compost heap. By the time Jacob realized he'd forgotten his math homework and Sammy informed me that he would be requesting that the principal fail him retroactively so he could go back to fifth grade, I began wondering where had I gone wrong?

When I finally double-parked in front of their new school, swarming with 2,000-plus kids, the boys just stared out the window like they were being pushed out of a shuttle over the moon. Again, I tried to calm their fears. “Look at these thousands of nice kids. Think about all your great classes — like trigonometry.”

“That’s high school math, Mom,” said Jacob.

“You know what I mean. Now have a great day!”

As I pulled away, I realized their lunches were still in the back seat — kids these days.

Don't want to follow in the Mayhem family's footsteps? Child and education experts weigh in on how to prep kids for a drama-free first day:

• “Talk positively about the pending school experience. Parents’ emotions are easily read by children who pick up on parental fears, sadness about separation, or concerns about their child’s adjustment. Drive by or visit the school to build familiarity. Shop together for school supplies or clothes. Treat going to school as a wonderful new adventure. —Kay Neff, founder of the Dearborn Heights Montessori Center in Michigan

• “Start getting them back on their school-time schedule slowly — about a week ahead of the first day. For example, put them to bed 10 minutes earlier and wake them up 10 minutes earlier.” —Heidi Waterfield, educational consultant

• “The night before, prepare lunches and snacks and set out clothes and backpacks. If you're unsure of the school's snack policy, send extra food with your child just in case.” —Julie Rebboah, president of Lightning Bug Learning Corporation

• “Many parents like to accompany their child to school on the first day, but that is not always possible. If this is a big issue for you and your child, you could certainly slip a note in a lunch box or backpack or in with some new school supplies. It's a little way of being there without being there.” —Aviva Pflock, coauthor of Mommy Guilt: Learn to Worry Less, Focus on What Matters Most and Raise Happier Kids

• “If you have allowed screen time privileges to increase over the summer, begin to curtail them (at least two weeks) prior to the start of school. Establish TV, video, and computer use rules before the first day of school, and stick to them." —Connie Hammer, certified parent coach

• “Do not drop off your child and leave. Your job is to make sure all the child's concerns have been addressed before you leave them anywhere! No matter how ridiculous you think the concern is, pay attention to it and walk them through it.” —Doris Jeanette, child psychologist

• “If your child is anxious about going to school, don’t freak out if your child’s anxiety escalates into screaming and crying, ‘I won’t go!’ Remain calm, cool, and collected. Your steadiness will calm your child. Don't say, ‘You have to handle it alone.’ Anxiety makes kids feel frightened and isolated. Instead, tell your child that you are a team. Say, ‘You're not alone, and together we're going to solve this problem and help you feel better.’” —Diane Peters Mayer, author of Overcoming School Anxiety

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TEST TAKING TIPS

To be able to get good results on your exam, you need to study, but no matter how hard you study if you don't know how to go about taking a test, whether multiple choice or essay, you won't score the highest possible mark.

Here are some tips on how to ace that test.

1. Arrive early or at least on time. Get a friend to exchange wake up calls just in case.

2. Expect and accept that you are going to experience a bit of stress.

3. Take time to read the questions thoroughly and follow instructions. Be clear on what is being asked. Highlight key words in the instructions. Listen to any last minute instructions.

4. Be aware of time restrictions and budget your time. Start with the easiest questions first.

5. Spend more time on the questions that have the highest marks value. For example: If an eassay question is worth half the test value, plan to spend at least half the alloted test time on that portion.

6. Don't spend too much time on questions you don't know the answers. Leave them and return to them later. If you still can't answer, have a guess (remember, there are no penalties for guessing.)

7. Pace yourself. Work quickly, but not hastily.

8. Don't panic, if you have a memory lapse. It is normal.

9. Don't worry if others finish before you do.

10. Make sure you answer every question on the test and do not change your answer without a good reason.

11. Use all your allocated time. If you finish early, read over your work. Double check you have answered all questions. Check spelling and grammar. It's easy to make silly mistakes.

12. Make sure you label and correctly identify all your work before turning in your test. Don't forget to write you name.

WHEN CHILDREN LIE

Question:

I've been catching my child in small lies, of the "I didn't do it" variety. How can I stop this behaviour before it starts to escalate?

Think about it:

Children lie for a variety of reasons. They lie to keep their parents happy with them, they lie so they won't get in trouble, they lie to cover embarrassment or inadequacy, or they lie because they don't make the clear distinction between fact and fiction. Teaching your child the value of telling the truth takes time, teaching and patience.

Don't play detective:

Don't ask questions that set your child up to lie. When your child has chocolate on his face and the candy is gone, don't ask, "Did you eat that candy bar that was in the fridge?" Instead make a statement of fact; "I'm disappointed that you ate the candy bar without asking." If your child says, "I didn't." don't play twenty questions, just state the facts, "The candy is gone, and there's chocolate on your face.”

REMEBER THAT:
You are teaching your child all the time, whether you plan it or not.

Spend time on solutions:

Focus on finding a solution instead of laying blame. "Regardless of how it happened, the lamp is broken. What are we going to do about it?"

Be straightforward and honest:

If you're not sure if your child is lying make an honest statement, "That doesn't sound like the truth to me."

Don't start the 'off the hook' mistake:

If your child comes to you with the truth, resist the urge to lecture. Thank the child for telling you and then focus on finding a solution or imposing a necessary consequence, without anger. Don't make the mistake of saying, "If you tell the truth, you won't be punished." We all make mistakes, and owning up to them can be difficult, but we still need to accept responsibility for our actions. As an adult, if you're driving your car and hit someone's car in the parking lot, you are not "off the hook" if you own up to your mistake, but you can be in serious trouble if you are caught in a "hit and run." So avoid the trap of saying, "When you tell the truth, you'll be off the hook," instead, think of it this way, "If you lie, you'll be in even bigger trouble!"

Review your expectations:

Kids sometimes lie because they feel they're not meeting your expectations, and they think it's easier to lie than feel like a failure. Take a look at how you respond to your child's mistakes or inadequacies, and make sure you leave room for imperfections.

Model truthfulness:

When your child hears you telling those innocent "little white lies," you are teaching your child something about honesty. Eg. Having your child tell someone on the phone that you're not home so that you don't have to talk. Shrinking your child's age so that you can get the cheaper rate at the amusement park, or at a restaurant. You are teaching your child all the time, whether you plan it or not.

If it's a pattern?

If your child develops a pattern of lying, or lies about important things, and is persistent about continuing the lie even after the truth is discovered, it would be wise for you to seek the advice of a professional. Your paediatrician, relatives or other parents. Now you can start to lecture your child.

Focus on finding a solution or imposing a necessary consequence, without anger

Coping With Separation Anxiety

Starting daycare is a major life transition for both young children and their families. Change, even when it is a positive change can be stressful. In many cases this may be the first time a child is away from the secure and loving arms of their family. Both the child and parents may experience anxiety about starting a daycare experience.

Parents want to know that their child will be in a loving and safe environment when the child is not in their direct care. It is not uncommon for parents to feel guilty about placing the child in a daycare program, thus making the farewell more difficult. Young children develop an attachment to their parents and are often secure in their daily home life and routine. There are specific measures that both parents and caregivers can take to ease the transition to care and alleviate separation anxiety.

For Parents

• Recognize your own feelings-Your child is sensitive to your emotional state and attitudes. If you are apprehensive about the childcare program or how your child will adjust, you may unwillingly convey this to your child. Be sure to always talk to the child about daycare as a positive and exciting thing. Avoid apologizing to the child about enrolling them in a daycare program.

• Recognize your child's temperament- You know your child better than anyone else. Let your knowledge about your child's personality and temperament guide how you approach this new transition. If your child is naturally somewhat shy and slow to warm up, then you will know that you may need to take extra time in introducing your child to a new environment and new people.

• Prepare your child in advance- Your child will have less anxiety if they know what to expect and are familiar with the program and caregivers. Bring the child along when you tour a program or meet a family daycare provider. Try to visit at least once where you can remain with the child as they explore the new surroundings.

• Make the first day a first week- One of the most successful strategies for alleviating separation anxiety is to make the break slowly. If possible, start your child's daycare experience slowly. Maybe only an hour the first day, two hours the next, until the child is comfortable remaining in care the full day.

• Reinforce a sense of trust with your child- Young children's separation anxiety is often closely tied to fears of abandonment. It is important to let them know that you will be returning for them at a designated time. With an older child you can even point out on the clock when you will return or give them a concrete milestone such as, "I will be back for you right after lunch time". It may also be helpful to discuss with your child where you will be and what you will be doing during the time of separation. In any case remind your child that you will indeed return.

• Leave something behind- Sometimes called transitional objects; blankies, teddys and other objects of comfort can help a child feel secure. Many parents find that an object that helps the child remember the parent is of great benefit. These "remembrance" objects may include photos or an object of the parents clothing.

• Communicate with the caregiver- They are your greatest ally in making the separation a smooth and calm experience. Be sure to let them know if you have any specific concerns and needs. Don't be afraid to specifically request their assistance or guidance.

• Say Good-bye- You may wish to warn that child that you will be leaving in five minutes, or that after the story you will be going to work. When it is time to go, say good-bye and go. Continued extensions to the separation seem to only add to anxiety and make the separation more difficult. It is never suggested to "sneak" out. Regardless of how upset the child is, sneaking out only adds to their anxiety, increases fear of abandonment, and breaks down the child's sense of trust.

Remember, overcoming separation anxiety and adjusting to daycare, like any major life change is a gradual process. Soon daycare will become a positive and exciting part of your child's daily routine. We hope this has helped you and soon your child will be coming to school with a smile!!

Let Your Child Get Dirty! It’s Essential for Physical and Mental Development

Do you follow your child around worrying that they might stain their clothes? Do you forbid playing outside because they might get dirty? Do you see germs and infections in every step they take? Are you trying to keep away friendly cute kittens because they might be disease carriers?

Do any of the sentences above represent your attitude towards your child? If yes, you must reconsider. Depriving your child of physical contact with the "Dirty, Outside World" is bad for its health. Sound unbelievable? How can something full of germs be essential for a kid’s development?

First of all, your child, in the delicate years between childhood and puberty, develops its immune system. The immune system is designed to defend the organism against millions of bacteria, microbes, parasites, viruses and toxins. But it needs to be trained; just like muscles need exercise to function properly. In order to recognize harmful germs, it needs to meet them first. Then it creates an archive, where it is all installed. When the time comes for a fight, the immune system will be prepared because it knows the enemy. Pure exposure to various microorganisms and other environmental factors leads to pure immune resistance. That means, that the child will be less susceptible to disease later in life. So, don’t exaggerate in hygiene matters. Let your child’s immune system harden, with the help of dirt.

Your child needs also to be active, run around and feel happy playing outside. Worrying about stains will make the child feel guilty about activities that make it happy. You cannot replace that happiness with clean clothes, or with indoor inactive activities such us TV or video games. This is especially true during the school year. Imagine being seated in a chair while experiencing growth and energy spurts! Getting loose outside home will help the child deal with that pressure.

Don’t underestimate your kids’ explorative skills. By exploring –not the house of course- it discovers the world. Exploration boosts the imagination as well as creativity, social and physical skills. Well-developed physical skills result in a healthy body. Creativity will bring adaptability, and social skills will bring success and mental health. All those will eventually turn an active child, into a lively, successful healthy adult.

Let friendly animals approach your child. They won’t hurt it; they will be of benefit. By keeping animals away you teach your child to do the same. Have you considered having a pet? Children raised with pets show many benefits. Developing positive feelings about pets can contribute to a child's self-esteem and self-confidence. Your child will develop trusting relationships with others much easier. A good relationship with a pet can also help in developing non-verbal communication, compassion, and empathy.

Finally, how important do you think memories are? Memories are moments of our lives, forming our personality. What would you like your child to remember from its childhood memories? Clean, germ-free clothes? Or shiny days outside, filled with laughter? Don’t deprive your child the freedom of climbing trees, plucking flowers, and building sand castles.

A word of caution:

1. Please ensure that all safety measures are taken in the children’s play area.

2. And also be careful if your child is allergic to things like dust etc.

Previous

This section contains practical advice to help meet the challenges of everyday parenting. New articles will be posted every two weeks.

What we try to offer is some clarification on the day to day procedure. We attempt to indicate, which procedure in the given situation may be helpful and which damaging. The more parents learn to really understand their children, the more they can help them in coping with mental, emotional and physical stress and in adopting social and moral values that are necessary for leading a full and satisfied life. Above all, remember that we are not working for perfection, but only for improvement.

This week’s topic is “Encouragement.”
Encouragement is more important than any other aspect of child-raising.

A child cannot grow, develop and gain a sense of belonging without encouragement. However, the techniques we use commonly, present a series of discouraging experiences for our children.

Example 1: Four-year old Alia wanted to help mum set the table for dinner. She picked up the bottle of water intending to fill the glasses. Mum grabbed the bottle and said very kindly, “No darling, you’ll spill the water. You arrange the spoons, I’ll pour the water.” Alia looked crushed and left the room.

Suppose Alia does spill some water. The loss of water is less important than the loss of confidence. Alia had the courage to undertake a new challenge. If water had been spilled, it could be wiped up and mum should acknowledge the courage of the attempt by asking Alia to try again.

Example 2: Eight year old Jameel and ten year old Zafar arrived home with their report cards. Jameel went to his room while Zafar ran to Dad. Dad expressed his delight with the good grades. “Where is Jameel? I want to see his grades. Dad calls Jameel and says: “I suppose you got all bad grades again, didn’t you? Get your report.” Jameel had three C’s and two D’s. “I am ashamed of you” shouted Dad, “Zafar always gets good grades. Why can’t you be like him? You can’t go outside to play. Go to your room.”

Jameel’s bad grades are the result of discouragement. Without seeing the report, Dad indicates that he expects bad grades. Since the father has no confidence in him, Jameel gives up and considers himself a failure. Then Dad says that he is ashamed of him. Jameel feels unworthy. Dad says that Jameel should be like Zafar and this seems like an impossible goal. On top of all this, he is punished by being sent to his room.

In order to encourage Jameel, Dad must stop comparing Jameel with Zafar. All comparisons are harmful; Jameel can only function in his own right-not as a copy of Zafar. Dad needs to have faith and confidence in Jameel’s abilities. Under the circumstances Jameel is doing exactly what Dad expects of him. Avoiding criticism Dad should acknowledge any accomplishment, no matter how small it is. Let us repeat the same incident and show how one can provide encouragement to an already deeply discouraged child.

Realizing that Jameel was avoiding the issue, Dad waited until he was alone with him. “Do you want me to sign your report card?” Jameel brought it with great fear. Dad saw it, and then said “I’m so happy to see that you enjoy English (one of the C subjects). Its fun, isn’t it?” He gives Jameel, a pat on the back and suggests “I’m going to buy a few things, would you like to come?” After some time, while they are shopping, Jameel says “Zafar got all A’s and I got mostly D’s.” Dad replies “It’s not so important that you get the same grades as Zafar. With just a little extra effort, you may also enjoy learning and find out how much more capable you are than you have thought till now.”

These illustrations show the importance of encouragement and point out some of the mistakes we as parents commonly and unknowingly make.

REMEMBER

• Parental love is best demonstrated through constant encouragement toward independence.

• Our children need courage. It is an attitude which guides them through all the daily problems and situations of childhood. Let us help them to develop and keep it.

• No lasting effect can come from one step of encouragement. It is a continuous process aimed at giving the child a sense of self-respect and accomplishment.

• Separate the deed from the doer- We must have it clear in our own minds that each “failure indicates only a lack of skill and does not affect the value of the person.

• You can’t do it all at once. Each small improvement is a step forward.

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Previous
It’s school once again!

We all remember the butterflies that going back to school often brings to our tummies. Everyone is anxious and excited, but disappointed that the holidays are over. Most children do their best to forget about school during those few short weeks. Jumping right back into the swing of things is difficult without preparing ahead of time. It's therefore quite important, especially for parents, to help make the transition back to school, a smooth one. A smooth start can give a child the confidence boost s/he needs to do well all year.

As with any new or potentially unsettling situation - be it starting school for the first time or entering a new grade or a new school - allow your child time to adjust.

*. Remind your child that everyone feels a little nervous about the first day of school - even Mom and Dad, and probably even the teacher - and that it will all become an every-day routine in no time.

*. Emphasize the positive things about going back to school, such as recollecting with old friends, meeting new classmates, buying school supplies, and most of all, a year with new learning experiences.

It's also important to talk to your child about what worries him/her and offer reassurance:

*. Are they afraid they won't make new friends or get along with their teachers?

*. Is the thought of schoolwork stressing them out?

*. Are they worried about the bully from last year?

Hear what your child has to say about their day-to-day activities at school. Ask them how they would want you to help them resolve any such matters.

You may want to consider adjusting your own schedule to make the transition smoother.

*. It's especially beneficial for parents to be home at the end of the school day for the first week or two.

But if you can't possibly be there at the end of the school day, try as much as possible to arrange your evenings so that you're able to give your child as much time as he or she needs, especially during these first few days.

Over the next few weeks, here are tips for making this transition easier for both, your child and yourself:

*. Establish a “Get Ready the Night Before” policy. Set uniforms ready for the next day and pack the schoolbag before bedtime and you’ll save precious time in the morning.

*. Establish and maintain school-day schedules for homework, TV, baths and bedtime etc.

*. Encourage school involvement. It's important to encourage participation in one or two activities that particularly interest your child. Discuss about his/her goals for the school year and how s/he might like to be involved in activities outside of the classroom.

*. Introduce yourselves. Young children are often shy with a new teacher. If you take your child to school during the first week, you might want to go into the classroom and introduce your child to the teacher. Let the teacher know about any special interests or challenges that your child has.

Remember:

It is your transition too! Each school year is a clean slate for your child. Don't bring up negative things that happened last year. If you are cheerful and confident about the coming year, your child will be too.

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Creating Memories-Spending the holidays with your kids-What dad’s can do?

The final school bell of the term has rung and our neighborhoods and living rooms are once again filled with children. If left entirely to their own devices, many children would simply spend their time this holiday watching daytime TV or movies or playing play station. What can we as dads do this holiday to make our children's vacation a more productive and positive experience?

Keep Reading Alive. Child educators know how hard it can be to start school again in the second term when children have just vegetated throughout holidays. By taking a positive approach to a holiday reading program, you can help your children’s’ minds stay active. In our family, we have a tradition of giving our children a book to read on the last day of school. Just keep in mind that you give them a balance of secular as well as spiritual readings.

Invite FRED to your place. FRED is a reading program-Fathers Reading Every Day. It encourages dads to read for 15 minutes each day to their children. Find a fun and entertaining book that is appropriate for your children's ages and go for it. However, do not make the mistake of selecting a book that interests you and does nothing for your kid.

Consider Day Camps or training. During the holiday, there are lots of organizations that offer day camps or holiday training programs. These may be one day, or every day for a week or two, or a few days during the holidays.

Holiday is Recreation Time. You might consider swimming lessons or a sport with which your child is not yet familiar. Tennis, cricket, football and other sports are often on the menu. Just don’t let them play the sport through the TV games.

Consider daylong field trips. Some of our most memorable experiences as a family have been when we have taken field trips to museums, historical sites, picnics and the like. It can be great fun and a great learning experience at the same time.

How about giving back? Many families find that volunteering is a great holiday activity. You may be surprised to know that there are many opportunities for adults and children to volunteer together in our own community. From a simple event organization volunteer to a week long volunteering at the mosque, any deed will make this holiday fruitful. However, do not expect the kid to volunteer while you stay away. You must do it together.

Vacation is an opportunity for a break from the regimented world of the school. But it doesn't have to be a time for just relaxing. By balancing the need for a little down time with a focus on a productive summer, families can make the most of this holiday.

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Health is wealth- Tackling obesity in children.

Majority of parents with school going children today are literate and exposed to a lot of literature on both good diet and wrong diet. Yet these very parents have children, who are overweight, a direct consequence of wrong diet. Name branding these children as is common by peers impact very negatively on their self esteem. And the cause is none other than negligence on the part of the parents. “But, why the hustle and bustle about weight?” One may ask:

An increasing number of teenagers are overweight, and if no intervention is made, 80% of them will stay overweight as adults. This can put them at risk for many medical problems, including diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and sleep apnea. Obesity can also adversely affect their self-esteem consequently lowering their learning as they lose interest fast.

While most teens should not be put on a severely restricted diet, a combined approach of a sensible diet and regular exercise will help to control their weight gain.

Children normally need a certain number of calories each day (energy allowance) that their bodies use as energy for normal daily activities (walking, breathing, etc.). This ranges for boys from 2000 calories for a 7-10 year old, 2500 calories for an 11-14 year old, and 3000 calories for a 15-18 year old. For girls the ranges are from 2000 calories for a 7-10 year old, to 2200 calories for an 11-18 year old. These are only estimates and some children need more (fast metabolism) or less (slow metabolism) of an energy allowance for daily activities. If a child consumes more food and calories than is required by their energy allowance, then those excess calories are converted to fat for storage. Conversely, if a child consumes less food and calories than is required by their energy allowance, then their body fat is converted to energy for the needed calories.

You can lose weight by either dieting (eating fewer calories each day) or by exercising, so that your body needs more energy and uses up more calories. Either way, body fat will be burned and converted to energy and you will lose weight.

Motivation

It is easier for your child to lose weight if he is motivated to do so. But even without motivation you can still help your child to lose weight by making healthy choices for his meals at home and encouraging regular exercise and physical activity.

Goals

The first goal of weight management in children should be to stop weight gain and maintain normal growth in height. This way they can 'grow into' their weight. Begin doing this by having your child eat healthier (about 500 fewer calories each day) and begin a program of regular exercise and physical activity. Once your child has stopped gaining weight and is on a regular program of dieting and exercising, you can set further goals of slowly losing weight (about a 10% reduction at a time) if necessary.

Behavior Modification

It is important to modify the behaviours that led your child to become overweight and these include: Limiting Television, playing video games or using the computer.

Exercise

An essential part of any weight loss or weight management program is regular exercise. Encourage your child to participate in a physical education class in school and extracurricular sports at school or in the community.
Some tips to increase your child's and family's physical activities include:
Walk or ride your bike instead of driving for short distances.
Use stairs instead of escalators or elevators, especially if you have to walk out of your way to find the stairs.
Park your car at the end of the parking lot and walk to the entrance of the mall or grocery store.
Encourage regular exercise for 20-30 minutes 3-4 times each week. This can include walking, jogging, swimming, bike riding, etc. It can also include playing a new sport, such as basketball, volleyball, tennis, etc.
Family exercise: go for routine family walks or bike rides in the neighborhood.

Previous article
Television and Children

Television is not all bad. However research has shown that as the amount of time spent watching TV goes up, the amount of time devoted not only to homework and study but other important aspects of life such as social development and physical activities decreases. And this can be alarming, raising a need for parents to step in and steer the pattern and content of TV watching.

When parents are reflecting on the effects of television within their families, they should consider a number of things: What TV offers my child in terms of information and knowledge?

How many hours a week a youngster my child’s age should watch television, the impact of violence and sex, and the influence of commercials?

As a Family:

Is the TV a central piece of furniture in your home!

Is it flicked on the moment someone enters the empty house?

Is it on during the daytime?

Is it part of the background noise of your family life?

Do I demonstrate by my own viewing that television should be watched selectively?

Since television is clearly here to stay. It is important that parents manage their children's TV viewing so that it can have a positive effect on their lives .

For Preschool Children

• Share the experience with your child:

A child's weekly schedule normally involves a school time, naptime (for young children), and play. Whenever possible in the normal course of the day's events, parents should watch with their children. Preschoolers enjoy having company to laugh with them and moreover it gives the parent an opportunity to explain what is going on. Interactive discussions can result afterwards in the form of: "Was that real or make-believe?" "Do people really act like that?"

• A culture of selective watching

Parents can demonstrate while the child is still very young that TV is a medium to be used selectively. They can quite literally point children in the direction of informative, educational programs. There are some remarkable things for a preschooler to see and enjoy on television, and parents can impart the wonders of it while discouraging undesirable programs.

An alternative to Television watching:
Children need to discover their own strengths and weaknesses in order to find fulfillment as adults do in both work and play. Watching television does not lead to these discoveries; it only limits children's involvement in those real-life activities that might offer their abilities a genuine testing ground. And young children's need for fantasy is gratified far better by their own make-believe activities then by the adult made fantasies that are offered on television.

For Elementary School Children

It is clear that for this age range parents need to monitor set limits to the amount of time spent and more importantly provide for and guide children towards appropriate fun options.

This is how others control the situation:

A number of families solve their television-control problems by living a virtually television-free schedule five days a week, enjoying meals filled with good conversation and a pace of life dominated by their own needs (outdoor / social activities). The children do their homework without the pressure of hurrying to finish before a specific TV show begins. On weekends they enjoy television as other families do but without feeling that it is taking up too much of their family's time together.

Other families set a strict daily time limit of no more than one hour of TV a day,. of course always with some howls of protest from the children. It is necessary for all adults in the family to be in complete agreement on this family rule. Negotiating and effort towards a mutual agreement is the way to go about it.

Sometimes the location of the television can aid the problem of control. A location in a far corner of the house where it cannot be flicked on as soon as someone comes home and where it is out of range of the refrigerator seems to limit television viewing.

Consider what works best for your children and for your family as a whole.

Violence on Television

It has not yet been definitively proven that viewing violence on television will lead a child into violent behavior. But even experts agree that it's not good for a child to be exposed constantly, several hours a day, day after day, week after week, to television violence. Research has shown that such exposure has at least four effects:

• Children may become less sensitive to the pain and suffering of others;
• They may become more fearful of the world around them;
• They may be more likely to behave in an aggressive manner toward other people;
• They may get an unrealistic sense of the amount of true violence that exists in the world.

It's Not All Bad!

Since television is definitely here to stay, parents need to look at it as a resource and not necessarily as a menace. A good way to start is to look into the list of the television stations which offer magnificent programs on nature, literature, history, current events, the arts, etc.

Also, consider this:

• Studies have indicated that television does increase the general vocabulary of children, especially when it involves term referring to outer space.
• Television does provide opportunities for children to learn about all kinds of things, although whether they do so to any great extent depends largely on the specific programs the child actually watches.
• Television can increase a child's range of interest since it exposes him to a variety of activities and topics he might not otherwise encounter-archeology, science of all kinds, architecture, music, etc.
• Television has probably been the most effective of all the mass media in making people aware of a wide range of human problems ranging from pollution to homelessness. It also has increased awareness and acceptance of various kinds of illness, both physical and mental.

Parents can communicate their personal feelings about undesirable programs by discouraging their children from watching them. We do have a choice of programs; and we also have a choice, for ourselves and at least for our younger children, of watching or not watching. There is an "Off" button on every set!

Research and contents references made from Child development Institute, LLA 1998- 2007 -------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------

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